Marty, you're making me cry, dammit!

So, as promised, here are the lyrics to my new tear-jerking Marty Robbins song. I'd really love to make and embed a video but my video-making software is being totally uncooperative. Bastards, recognize my audio! Feh. So here are the lyrics. Read them and weep as I do. If you don't, you are a heartless philistine.

And now my friends you've asked me what makes me sad and still
And why my brow is darkened like the clouds upon the hill.
Run in your ponies closer and I'll tell to you my tale
Of Utah Carol my partner and his last ride on the trail.

We rode the range together and rode it side by side.
I loved him like a brother, and I wept when Utah died.
We were rounding up one morning, when work was almost done,
When on his side the cattle started on a frightened run.

Underneath the saddle that the boss's daughter rode,
Utah that very morning had placed a bright red robe,
So the saddle might ride easy for Lenore his little friend,
And it was this red blanket that brought him to his end.

The blanket was now dragging behind her on the ground.
The frightened cattle saw it and charged it with a bound.
Lenore then saw her danger and turned her pony's face,
And leaning in the saddle, tied the blanket to its place.

But in leaning lost her balance, fell in front of that wild tide.
"Lay still Lenore I'm coming" were the words that Utah cried.
His faithful pony saw her and reached her in a bound.
I thought he'd been successful, and raised her from the ground.

But the weight upon the saddle had not been felt before.
His back-cinch snapped like thunder and he fell by Lenore.
Picking up the blanket he swung it o'er his head,
And started cross the prairie. "Lay still Lenore" he said.

When he got the stampede turned and saved Lenore his friend,
He turned to face the cattle and meet his fatal end.
His six-gun flashed like lightning, the report rang loud and clear.
As the cattle rushed and killed him, he dropped the leading steer.

On his funeral morning I heard the preacher say
"I hope we'll all meet Utah at the roundup far away."
Then they wrapped him in the blanket that saved his little friend,
And it was this red blanket that brought him to his end.

F*ck you, Marty. I'm still weeping.

Oh good lord this is funny

Please don't ask me how I happened across it. It was quite by accident.

Country/Western Trivia (Gunfighter Ballads Redux Edition)

Well dagnabbit, I got no takers at all on my Hank Snow Edition so far. Tres disappointmente. Well, I'll repost it soon with high hopes for a better response. But this is a holiday weekend so I'm sure lots of folks are not available, and the Hankster deserves better than that.

Soooooo, in his place this weekend, I'll do a redux of one that got a very nice response some time back. I don't mind relegating the Great and Powerful Marty Robbins to this holiday weekend, because I've already dedicated two separate editions to him. But at the very least, I will try to change some of the questions, especially those that were answered quickly before.

Ah, Marty. You do it so well. I took "Gunfighter Ballads" on my bike ride today, as I've done so many times before. I did notice, however, that I seem to have changed my pattern a bit with this album. There are three songs in particular that I have tended, in the past, to listen to first (perhaps even a couple of times) before listening to the others. Today (and, TBT, the last time I took it along) I listened to one of the others twice. It really has grown on me, and it brings tears to my eyes. And it's in this list (naturally). So herewith are some great Marty Robbins "Gunfighter Ballads":

1) Who came riding from the south side, slowly looking all around?

2) The nights are cool and I'm a fool. What are the stars? [Heroditus Huxley: Each star's a pool of water, cool, clear water]

3) "Twenty one men I have put bullets through." Who will make twenty two?

4) I head for home when day is done with my pocket money jingling in my jeans. To where?

5) They'll bury Flo tomorrow. What are they doing tonight?

6) His legs are all spavined, he's got pigeon toes, little pig eyes and a big Roman nose. He's got little pin ears that touched at the tip, he's U-necked ewe-necked and old, and has a long, lower jaw. Who is he? [Hint: oddly enough, it's not Bingley, though THS might beg to differ] [Wolfwalker: He's the strawberry roan]

7) [Slightly cheating on this one, the lyrics in this question did not appear in the original album or single edition of this song, they were omitted by the publishing company, Pox Be Upon Them, and only later restored in a full-length version]

Ahem, where was I? Oh yeah, I remember now.

7) I was shocked by the foul, evil deed I had done, and had only one chance. What was that chance, and what did I do with it? [Heroditus Huxley: That one chance was too run, so I stole a (fortunately pre-saddled) horse and skedaddled off to the badlands of New Mexico]

8) I'm as sad as the willow that weeps where?

9) This kind of sinful living leads only to a fall. I learned that much and more the night I heard what?

10) A woman's love is wasted when she loves what?

11) Where will my homesick heart trouble me no more?

12) [Just for the record, this is the song I mentioned that I've been listening to more when listening to this album. Gads, it brings tears to my eyes each time I hear it, it's such a beautiful ballad]

Ahem [dries eyes], where was I? Oh yeah.

12) A red blanket brought him to his end in two different ways: as the cause of his death (through his own selfless action in saving his young friend) and as his funeral shroud. Run in your ponies closer and I'll tell to you my tale of whom?

And I will post the lyrics of this lovely ballad soon. If you've never heard it, you owe it to yourself.

National Ammo Day

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know it was last week. But I just got out to our local (sorta) Bass Pro Shop yesterday to hit the after Thanksgiving sales.

Well, I didn't actually pick up anything in their ad but I did pickup a box of this, in anticipation of picking up my new piece next week. Seems like a decent enough price but I really gotta start reloading them soon.

"This is not a chawade.."

So I was reminded by Joel this evening of just how old I am in a response to my comment on this post. Truth be told, it's been a lot of years and I tend to forget which unforgettable sketch was in which unforgettable movie.

Yeah, seems I have forgotten the unforgettable. Go figure.

But in any case, here is part 1 of 5 of one of my favorite sketches from Kentucky Fried Movie. Please do click through to the rest of the posted sketches. My personal favorite part in in Part 4 of 5 (the part with the transmission and the few seconds just before it).

Indeed, "This is not a chawade. We need toto concentwation." Heh.

And speaking of the great Stan Freberg...

Classic.

Amusing, if it could actually happen

So I received an email from a former coworker, one of those amusing emails that runs around the 'net:

Wanna really upset liberal (pardon the redundancy) Democrats? Then Bush should resign now!

So Dick Cheney becomes President.

Then, Cheney should appoint Condoleeza Rice as VP.

Then, two weeks later, Cheney resigns and...

Condoleeza Rice, A Republican, becomes the First Woman President! And the first black President!

Giggle.