Marty, you're making me cry, dammit!

So, as promised, here are the lyrics to my new tear-jerking Marty Robbins song. I'd really love to make and embed a video but my video-making software is being totally uncooperative. Bastards, recognize my audio! Feh. So here are the lyrics. Read them and weep as I do. If you don't, you are a heartless philistine.

And now my friends you've asked me what makes me sad and still
And why my brow is darkened like the clouds upon the hill.
Run in your ponies closer and I'll tell to you my tale
Of Utah Carol my partner and his last ride on the trail.

We rode the range together and rode it side by side.
I loved him like a brother, and I wept when Utah died.
We were rounding up one morning, when work was almost done,
When on his side the cattle started on a frightened run.

Underneath the saddle that the boss's daughter rode,
Utah that very morning had placed a bright red robe,
So the saddle might ride easy for Lenore his little friend,
And it was this red blanket that brought him to his end.

The blanket was now dragging behind her on the ground.
The frightened cattle saw it and charged it with a bound.
Lenore then saw her danger and turned her pony's face,
And leaning in the saddle, tied the blanket to its place.

But in leaning lost her balance, fell in front of that wild tide.
"Lay still Lenore I'm coming" were the words that Utah cried.
His faithful pony saw her and reached her in a bound.
I thought he'd been successful, and raised her from the ground.

But the weight upon the saddle had not been felt before.
His back-cinch snapped like thunder and he fell by Lenore.
Picking up the blanket he swung it o'er his head,
And started cross the prairie. "Lay still Lenore" he said.

When he got the stampede turned and saved Lenore his friend,
He turned to face the cattle and meet his fatal end.
His six-gun flashed like lightning, the report rang loud and clear.
As the cattle rushed and killed him, he dropped the leading steer.

On his funeral morning I heard the preacher say
"I hope we'll all meet Utah at the roundup far away."
Then they wrapped him in the blanket that saved his little friend,
And it was this red blanket that brought him to his end.

F*ck you, Marty. I'm still weeping.

Oh good lord this is funny

Please don't ask me how I happened across it. It was quite by accident.

Country/Western Trivia (Gunfighter Ballads Redux Edition)

Well dagnabbit, I got no takers at all on my Hank Snow Edition so far. Tres disappointmente. Well, I'll repost it soon with high hopes for a better response. But this is a holiday weekend so I'm sure lots of folks are not available, and the Hankster deserves better than that.

Soooooo, in his place this weekend, I'll do a redux of one that got a very nice response some time back. I don't mind relegating the Great and Powerful Marty Robbins to this holiday weekend, because I've already dedicated two separate editions to him. But at the very least, I will try to change some of the questions, especially those that were answered quickly before.

Ah, Marty. You do it so well. I took "Gunfighter Ballads" on my bike ride today, as I've done so many times before. I did notice, however, that I seem to have changed my pattern a bit with this album. There are three songs in particular that I have tended, in the past, to listen to first (perhaps even a couple of times) before listening to the others. Today (and, TBT, the last time I took it along) I listened to one of the others twice. It really has grown on me, and it brings tears to my eyes. And it's in this list (naturally). So herewith are some great Marty Robbins "Gunfighter Ballads":

1) Who came riding from the south side, slowly looking all around?

2) The nights are cool and I'm a fool. What are the stars? [Heroditus Huxley: Each star's a pool of water, cool, clear water]

3) "Twenty one men I have put bullets through." Who will make twenty two?

4) I head for home when day is done with my pocket money jingling in my jeans. To where?

5) They'll bury Flo tomorrow. What are they doing tonight?

6) His legs are all spavined, he's got pigeon toes, little pig eyes and a big Roman nose. He's got little pin ears that touched at the tip, he's U-necked ewe-necked and old, and has a long, lower jaw. Who is he? [Hint: oddly enough, it's not Bingley, though THS might beg to differ] [Wolfwalker: He's the strawberry roan]

7) [Slightly cheating on this one, the lyrics in this question did not appear in the original album or single edition of this song, they were omitted by the publishing company, Pox Be Upon Them, and only later restored in a full-length version]

Ahem, where was I? Oh yeah, I remember now.

7) I was shocked by the foul, evil deed I had done, and had only one chance. What was that chance, and what did I do with it? [Heroditus Huxley: That one chance was too run, so I stole a (fortunately pre-saddled) horse and skedaddled off to the badlands of New Mexico]

8) I'm as sad as the willow that weeps where?

9) This kind of sinful living leads only to a fall. I learned that much and more the night I heard what?

10) A woman's love is wasted when she loves what?

11) Where will my homesick heart trouble me no more?

12) [Just for the record, this is the song I mentioned that I've been listening to more when listening to this album. Gads, it brings tears to my eyes each time I hear it, it's such a beautiful ballad]

Ahem [dries eyes], where was I? Oh yeah.

12) A red blanket brought him to his end in two different ways: as the cause of his death (through his own selfless action in saving his young friend) and as his funeral shroud. Run in your ponies closer and I'll tell to you my tale of whom?

And I will post the lyrics of this lovely ballad soon. If you've never heard it, you owe it to yourself.

National Ammo Day

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know it was last week. But I just got out to our local (sorta) Bass Pro Shop yesterday to hit the after Thanksgiving sales.

Well, I didn't actually pick up anything in their ad but I did pickup a box of this, in anticipation of picking up my new piece next week. Seems like a decent enough price but I really gotta start reloading them soon.

"This is not a chawade.."

So I was reminded by Joel this evening of just how old I am in a response to my comment on this post. Truth be told, it's been a lot of years and I tend to forget which unforgettable sketch was in which unforgettable movie.

Yeah, seems I have forgotten the unforgettable. Go figure.

But in any case, here is part 1 of 5 of one of my favorite sketches from Kentucky Fried Movie. Please do click through to the rest of the posted sketches. My personal favorite part in in Part 4 of 5 (the part with the transmission and the few seconds just before it).

Indeed, "This is not a chawade. We need toto concentwation." Heh.

And speaking of the great Stan Freberg...

Classic.

Amusing, if it could actually happen

So I received an email from a former coworker, one of those amusing emails that runs around the 'net:

Wanna really upset liberal (pardon the redundancy) Democrats? Then Bush should resign now!

So Dick Cheney becomes President.

Then, Cheney should appoint Condoleeza Rice as VP.

Then, two weeks later, Cheney resigns and...

Condoleeza Rice, A Republican, becomes the First Woman President! And the first black President!

Giggle.

Quote of the Day

Just heard it on the radio, an email to the morning show:

"I think members of Congress should wear uniforms like NASCAR, so that we can identify their corporate sponsors."

Happy Thanksgiving!

Whatever your plans, have a happy and safe holiday.

I thought about embedding "Alice's Restaurant"; a local Classic Rock station traditionally plays it every Thanksgiving. But then I thought, "Nah, it's been done." So I thought I would post this one instead (actual Thanksgiving part starts about 3:25 in):



Damn I love Stan Freberg.

Unfortunately...

I have not yet discovered the secret of hiding parts of posts. So please be aware that there is a Hank Snow Trivia post below the long, picture laden posts immediately below this.

Family pictures

Deal with it, youngsters. I'm fried from staring at spreadsheets all day and I'm inflicting my misery on you. These are more stills from the family-home-movies DVD, pre-China as it were. These are various Christmas movies over the years, from roughly 1956 through roughly 1965.


My lovely Auntie, 1956.


Mom and Uncle Jack (Auntie's husband), same year.


Grandma with the Littlest Bro. This would be 1963.


Me and Littlest Bro, from 1964.


Littlest Bro. He's sitting in front of our "entertainment center": a B/W TV with AM/FM radio and record player all in one. Very avante garde for its time, even if bought used.


Me an Little Bro the Firefighter, him with his grenade launcher. That was one of the coolest toys any of us ever got.

Unfortunately, no still pictures were ripped by the conversion company of this part but perhaps I will try to rip some video later. Yes, there are video scenes of our musical instruments. The ones our family friend Shine got us boys for Christmas one year (I guess it was 1964, I had thought it was 1965):



For me a trumpet, for Little Bro the Firefighter a drum set, and for Littlest Bro a xylophone. Yes, Mom (bless her kind, forgiving heart) allowed Shine to live.

That Chinese Movie

So as I mentioned before, I'm intrigued and stymied by the China travelog (I think that's what it is) I found. I think it's from the 1930s (judging by the clothes I see on the Westerners), and I'm uploading some of the images here.

It occurs to me that this is perhaps the very sort of thing my Dear Cousin Edna might have. She did a fair amount of traveling in the Far East before WWII and I have the pictures to prove it. However, this was with my family's stuff, not Edna's (the stuff my Mom saved after Edna passed away was mostly in one box) so it's still very confusing.

Anyway, I'll try to rip and show some of the video later when I have more time. These images are some of those pulled by the film-to-DVD conversion company and printed on the DVD box, and helpfully provided in a folder on the DVD.

First up, some reasons I think it's from the 1930s (or 1920s): Title Cards (or Intertitles, as I just learned they are also called).







From these Title Cards, I also learned that Punch and Judy originated in China:



And here is the first (and so far only) clue as to the date of this travelog:



Unfortunately, so far the only references I can find to a ship call the "General Sherman" in the far east are for an incident in Korea in 1866, well before these movies were made.

Well, in any case, here are a few more pics from the DVD:















Seriously, this is very intriguing, and if anyone can shed any light on it I'm all ears.

Country/Western Trivia (Hank Snow edition)

As promised. Yes, my young friends, I know I've neglected the trivia posts for a while now. I'm sorry. Been busy. But I hope to make it up with some Hank Snow.

Small confession: Many years ago, when I was young and foolish (as opposed to old and foolish) I tended to confuse the names Hank Snow and Hank Thompson. I know, I know, blasphemy, burn in Hell, and all that. But I did. As much as I liked a lot of country music back in them days, I didn't pay a lot of attention to who did what and stuff.

But times have changed and I now (sorta) remember which Hank did which song. Truth be told, I really hadn't heard a lot of Hank Snow's material until recently, when I brought home a CD from my Mom's collection to listen to (and which has one hell of a fashion statement on the cover).

Two songs in particular stand out, of course, but aside from those I really hadn't heard much of his stuff. Well, now I have. And I shall inflict it on you. I know, of course, that at least the two aforementioned songs you have no doubt heard. A few of the others I remember from many years ago, all the rest are ones I never heard until recently on my weekly bike rides.

Feh. Enough babbling nonsense. Let's go with a Baker's dozen of Hank:

1) [N.B.: this presupposes that the locations mentioned are in chronological order; they are not, of course, they are in an odd rhyming order but that will not stop us from presupposing that they are in chronological order, and since this is almost certainly the Hankster's most folks know song and everyone and their brother has heard it. End run-on sentence.]

Ahem. Multi-part question:

1) Please identify the following locations:

(a) After Reno, to which three places did I go?

(b) And after Buffalo, to which three locations?

(c) And after Wichita, to which three locations?

(d) And which three after Tampa?

Okay, I'll suspend this for now. But there will be more later. Because I'm just that way and love this song just that much.

2) I've got a pretty mama in Tennessee that does what?

3) What did I do after crossing deserts bare?

4) I'm on a bad motorcycle with a devil in the seat. How fast am I traveling and where?

5) After Boston, to which three locations did I go?

6) You dealt the cards, but you missed the play. So what am I going to board?

7) To which three locations did I go after after Washington?

8) I've wined you and dined you till my money is gone. So now, what's over and what's on?

9) To which three locations did I go after Glen Rock?

10) I'll love you until the day I die. Why?

11) Where (3X) did I go after Pittsfield?

12) I ain't got time for a triflin' woman. So what am I doing?

13) And where (3X) did I go after Tennessee? And (3X) after Spirit Lake? And (3X) after Elmsburg? And (3X) after Kansas City?

Whoa. Gotta stop now. Don't want to burn out on that song.

Whoa, this is way freakin' weird

So, as some of you may remember, some months ago I converted old home movies to DVD. I even uploaded a few for your amusement/mockery.

Well, when I was at the ranch at deer season, I found a couple more rolls, though these were not the standard little roughly-3-inch rolls like before. These were larger, and one was a 16mm instead of the usual 8mm or super-8mm. Anyway, I took them to Costco to work their magic. Just got them back yestiddy and took a look today.

Well actually, yestiddy when I picked them up I knew something was weird. Costco (or their subcontracter, more accurately) puts pictures on the box of the DVD. I saw something was odd when I looked at the box.

No, it's not like it was pr0n or anything like that (though I wouldn't put THAT past my Dad, horndog that he was). No, after the several years of Christmas movies was what seems to be a documentary about China. Gads, I wish there was sound with the old movies but no. Just text as there was with the old silent movies. Tres odd. Only thing I can figure is that Dad got this film when he was in the Navy back in the 1950s (the people, including the Westerners, look to be from the 1940s but I can't be sure). Gads, for many reasons, including this, I'm kicking myself for not having done this stuff before Mom passed away.

Anyway, on the DVD before the aforementioned documentary (I assume) was a lot of footage from Christmases long past. Some from before I was born, some from when we lived at the ranch, some from when we lived in Muscoy, some from when we lived in the north end of San Bernardino. I think some footage is from a trip to Oregon but I can't be certain. Grandpa and his sister Aunt Mae are in some footage. George and Margie and their son Don are in some of it (my Dad grew up with George in Halfway, this footage is from before Don joined up and went to Vietnam). More besides.

Also, Louie is in it. He was my Grandma's second husband, after my Grandpa died, but before Grandpa Joe. Realistically, I should remember him but I really don't, and don't remember ever hearing of him until I was an adult. Perhaps I just blocked him out. I do remember when Grandma married Grandpa Joe, but I just don't remember Louie. Probably just as well.

Possibly I will upload some vids soon, we'll see.

The jingoistic ugly American in me just loves this

Knowing my taste for fine American whiskies, my good buddy Julie sent along this story that was on CBS News this morning. Pretty interesting, and I just loved this part:

What happens to those barrels once they're emptied? Here's a delicious little irony: Most of them are sent to Scotland and used again.

So with every sip of some fine old scotch, you're likely drinking a little bit of bourbon.

That amuses me.

Administrative Announcement

A Hank Snow Edition of Country Western Trivia is coming soon. Keep checking back for it in case I forget...

Quote of the Day

"OH GOD THE STUPIDITY, IT BUUURNS."

Runner up (which was actually going to be the Quote of the Day until I read the first comment):

"Can we all agree that if you don’t know what suffrage is, you shouldn’t be allowed to vote?"

One would think.

UPDATE: Minor observation. I just stepped down to the lunch room to fill up my water bottle. There's a small crowd that watches "Deal or No Deal" while eating lunch. It occurs to me that "Deal or No Deal" is apparently on a higher intellectual level than "The View".

Mamma Mia!

So the local RWDB morning show spent a few minutes mocking Italians.

Well, not really, but they did spend a few minutes mocking a naming contest for a new combat jet fighter trainer built by an Italian company.

An Internet contest to name the new M-346 combat jet trainer [built by manufacturer Alenia Aermacchi] has elicited more than 2,000 ideas.

[...]

[A]viation buffs at Internet forums have proposed choices like the Pizza Pie, Italian Stallion, Turbo Pigeon and Pompeii.

All great names, I'm sure.

One thing I never knew: the F-16 fighter is officially known as the "Flying Falcon", but no one ever uses it. Story says it's also called (unofficially) the "Viper" but I've never heard it referred to as anything but F-16.

So I'm finally doing some actual gun blogging

And HH and Jeff gave me an idea for another post. I mentioned that, in addition to the .45 I'm buying, I'd like to get a Garand, among other new firearms. A number of folks mentioned that it's money slowing down their own personal gun-buying frenzy, and I sure feel that too.

So, if money were no issue at all, what would be your own personal wish list of guns to buy? Here's mine (or at least part of it) in the order I would likely buy them:

First, a flintlock replica rifle ("Pensylvania" or "Kentucky" style rifle). I already own a Hawken style caplock but I do enjoy blackpowder shooting. I'm a sucker for historical stuff like this, and not just guns. Given unlimited resources, I suppose I could become a "real" collector, but I'm a shooter more than a historian so I'd prefer shootable replicas to originals. And the colonial/revolutionary period is a special interest for me.

After the Pennsylvania rifle, I'd get a Ruger Single-Six. I know all the arguments for a double-action vs. single-action revolver, but I have to go traditional route on this one (with, of course, the bow to modernity of actual, useable sights and the option of .22LR and .22 mag). Besides, I almost always shoot double-action revolvers in single-action anyway. And it would be so handy on camping/hunting trips to take small game for the pot.

Okay, those last two are my list of "even if I don't become mega-rich" guns. They are ones I WILL own, hopefully before I die of old age.

Now, for the ones I doubt I'd be able to buy before winning the lottery:

First off, everything in the Navy Arms catalog. Oh yeah, I loves me some historical, blackpowder stuff. In particular, I want the Paterson Colt, the 1847 Walker, and the 1860 Army. I already have a .36 1851 Navy, and it is so much fun to shoot. Also, those top-break revolvers look pretty cool, as does the LeMat revolver; I'd have to check out some of them too. And what collection would be complete without an 1873 SA Army?

On the longarms front, I'd first go for the three-band Enfield, then browse through the other Civil War offerings, and back up to the 18th century for a Brown Bess. And after the war, I'd move on to the several styles of buffalo guns and single shots, in particular the 1873 Springfield, the 1874 Sharps, and the Remington Rolling Block.

And thence to the Henry and Winchester collections.

Hmm. Anything missing here? Oh yes, modern arms. I'd buy a motley collection of more modern stuff, including the 1895 Lee straight pull, a 1903 Springfield, a Lee-Enfield, and others. Oh, and some EBRs, too. But the top, number one in my list of "modern" rifles? The slickest bolt-action in the history of rifles.

That's my collection for tonight. I'll update if I think of any more particulars. Please drop you wish lists in the comments.

Quote of the day

"Cancer, you lose this one, you bastard!"

YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYY! for Ricki's Dad!

National Ammo Day

My bad. I didn't buy ammo on National Ammo Day. However, I did start the paperwork on a firearm, to be retrieved some 10+ days hence (piss on the CA legislature *spit*). I'm kinda bassackwards that way. I promise I will buy some ammo on National Buy a Gun Day.

Anyhoo, I've wanted a .45 Model 1911 for a long time, and I thought "there's no time like the present."

Oh, and there's the part about an anti-gun potentio-socialist in the White House with a Dembulb majority in both houses of Congress, and the potential mayhem that may ensue. So I decided to go for it.

The big decision: "What to do, what to do."

See, I'm a traditionalist in large part. I've wanted a Model 1911 for some time, seeing as how it was a mainstay of the U.S. military through two World Wars and beyond (same reason I want a Garand and a Springfield Model 1903, though I can't afford them). But the conundrum, for me, was: completely traditional route (i.e., Colt or Springfield standard military grade) or a newer model with the modern accoutrements (useable sights, no thumb-killing hammers, etc.)?

What to do, what to do?

So I compromised. Well, actually, I caved to certain realities. I wanted to buy local to home if possible (rather than local to work, where there are a few more options), I wanted a shootable weapon instead of a shootable-but-probably-should-just-hang-on-the-wall weapon, and this was just so pretty. Well, pretty and functional. Oh, and the one I settled on is a limited-edition, two-tone gun which comes just a wee bit closer to the blued metal of the traditional route, rather than the modern stainless route.

And since it's in the venerable "Colt Commander" configuration, I guess that's just barely traditional enough (the original Commander style having come out nearly 60 years ago, even before I was born) to satisfy my traditionalist leanings.

Aw hell. Who am I kidding? I caved to modernism. But I can live with that. I'm a gun whore, I admit it.

Joel Rocks

Yeah, that Joel. Dude, that was so cool.

*sniff* I'd say "I love you, man" if the expression didn't have some unpleasant overtones.

And speaking of Booker T and the MGs...

One of the coolest things about "Time is Tight" is the way the main theme kind of sneaks up on you under the background riffs. There's another Sixties song I just love that does the same thing. Okay, yeah, I'll admit it. I'm a sucker for surfer music, at least part of it. I loves me some Beach Boys and I loves me some Ventures and I loves me some Jan and Dean. But there is one, count 'em, one piece from the early 1960s surfer era that TOTALLY embodies the cool, understated, bitchin', "sneak-up-on-you" theme that is the essence of surfer cool.

Unfortunately, the Chantays unfortunately chose to unfortunately allow it to be unfortunately showcased on the unfortunately Lawrence unfortunately Welk unfortunately Show unfortunately. Unfortunately.

Dudes, I love you guys but unfortunately, "Serutan" spelled backwards is "Natures", and dudes, how could you? Hey, I loves me some '40s music and stuff, but really, Welk? Damn, guys, that hurts bad.

Well, major "make me feel even more like a geezer" stab-in-the-gut aside, here are the Chantays on the Lawrence Welk Show in 1963:



And here, to atone for embedding a Lawrence Welk Show video, is one with the studio version of the song (with suitably '60s weirdness for the video part):

STFU you f***ing idiots

I'm sorry, stupid people, you don't get a do-over just because you don't like the outcome.

Prop. 8 backers, AG ask court to hear challenges

SAN FRANCISCO -- The sponsors of California's new same-sex marriage ban and Attorney General Jerry Brown urged the state's highest court Monday to hear a series of lawsuits seeking to overturn the measure, saying it's too urgent a matter to be left unsettled.

Actually, those suits should be thrown out immediately and the lawyers involved disbarred. And some idiots slapped around.

"The petitions raise issues of statewide importance, implicating not only California's marriage laws but also the initiative process and the Constitution itself," the attorney general argued in papers filed with the California Supreme Court.

"This court can provide certainty and finality in this matter," he said.

Congratulation, Governor Moonbeam, you are only half an idiot now, in that you actually realize that the court can provide certainty and finality.

On the first part, however, you are still an idiot. I don't like the outcome any more than a lot of other people, but allowing that an initiative BROUGHT BEFORE THE ELECTORATE PROPERLY UNDER THE LAWS OF THE STATE OF CALIFORNIA, and then VOTED IN BY THE ELECTORATE OF THE STATE OF CALIFORNIA, according to the LAWS AND CONSTITUTION OF THE STATE OF CALIFORNIA, raises "issues of statewide importance" is merely stupid. It raises no such issues. The backers of these lawsuits have absolutely no leg to stand on unless they can bring the feds into it. And I don't think they want to do that.

Gay and civil rights groups, the city of San Francisco and others have asked the court to void the measure on the grounds that voters did not have the authority to make, what they say, is a fundamental constitutional change.

I'm sorry, you are too fucking stupid for words. Under the LAWS OF THE STATE OF CALIFORNIA, and the CONSTITUTIONALLY APPROVED RULES FOR CHANGING THE STATE CONSTITUTION, the voters DID INDEED HAVE THE AUTHORITY TO MAKE A FUNDAMENTAL CONSTITUTIONAL CHANGE. If you don't like what the voters approved, THAT'S TOO FUCKING BAD.

Look people, I've said it before, I'll say it again. You want change? Work for it. It's not like you had your asses handed to you this time, as with Prop. 20 (or whichever number it was) some years ago. You (we) got beat by what could plausibly be described as a margin of "people who support gay marriage but hate activist judges who pull rulings out of their asses". But if you win on this one, then there is nothing outside of the power of judges. If they can declare that a constitutional amendment PROPERLY BROUGHT BEFORE THE PEOPLE, and PROPERLY VOTED IN UNDER THE LAWS OF THE STATE OF CALIFORNIA is to be denied just because some people don't like it, then there is absolutely nothing that can properly be described as "the rule of law" in this state. They might as well just decide that the state supreme court is dictator for life.

No particular reason

Other than the incredible awesome that is Booker T and the MGs.

Unfortunately not to be embedded, here is "Time is Tight" and "Soul Limbo".

But here is a live, embeddable version of "TiT" (the jokes just write themselves, don't they?)

And speaking of whiskey...

Well, actually I hadn't been but I am now. Couple'a things I've been meaning to post but forgot to until now.

First, I can't find a link or pic on this 'net thingy but last week at Costco I happened across a great Jack Daniel gift set at a great price. It's a wooden box (hinged door, etc.) containing a fifth each of Jack's mainstay Old Number 7, Gentleman Jack, and (be still my heart) his Single Barrel. All three in one box, for $72. Such a deal. And all for me. Not that I've opened them yet, I'm still working on the bottle of Evan Williams I picked up a few months ago. Call me a lightweight if you must, but I just don't drink that much at one time. I'm a sipper, not a guzzler.

Second requires a small bit of backstory or two: First, it is my family's tradition to have lots of whiskey available at deer season. Well, it was in the old days, primarily for the poker religiously played on Saturday nights after a long day of deer hunting. Some years ago, I noticed how anemic the crew had become after the loss of the older generation, in that I saw the same bottle of bourbon from the year before . And the year before that. And still not empty. (Also, there was the fact that we started to make "Pepsi runs" instead of "beer runs"). Time was when at least two or three bottles were barely enough to get through the poker game.

Anyway, on one of the first days I was out at the ranch, the weather was pretty warm, and Little Bro the Firefighter and I were tramping around. We weren't really doing any serious hiking so I was in sneakers, and it occurred to me that the warm weather was not only warm, it was rattlesnake weather. So on our next trip into town I went looking for some rattlesnake medicine, i.e., some shotshells for my .44. We trekked into Wally World, but couldn't find the appropriate ammo. But the salesperson was very kind and mentioned that people had told him that if it couldn't be found at Walmart, it could be found at Longs. So we trekked over to Longs and sure enough, we found the rattlesnake medicine I sought.

And in addition, they had a sale on some gift sets, a fifth of 101 Proof with two (count 'em!) two highball glasses. Enough to last me for at least three or four deer seasons! Huzzah! And of course, I could not pass up a sale on bourbon.

Oh, and for the part I had meant to post earlier (and actually thought I had in my trip report but apparently not, at least, I can't find it), while we were standing in line at the checkout counter, me with the Wild Turkey in one hand and a box of .44 shotshells in the other, I remarked to the Little Bro:

"Whiskey and ammo. What could possibly go wrong?"

Heh.

For Val and Ricki

The whole crew over at the FFOT has been weirded out and traumatized by Ricki's reference to the mastodon balls and that, um, news story linked by Val. So I thought I'd lighten the mood by posting about a song I heard on KFAT radio years ago, called "Rocky Mountain Oysters". I went a-youtubin' for it. Couldn't find it. However, I did learn that there is a musical-comedy drag troupe called "Rocky Mountain Oysters".

No only that, I also learned that the town of Eagle, Idaho, holds a rocky mountain oyster feed every year as a fund raiser for its fire department. And they have some kickass funny ads for it:

Dear Gay People

Not all of you, just those of you protesting and blocking intersections and roughing up old ladies and boycotting Utah:

STFU and listen to this guy. And this guy. Yeah, you're unhappy and I understand that, but right now you are starting to piss off the fence sitters and even your supporters like me.

You are your own worst enemy. Well, if what little I've read about some marginal fringe group called "Bash Back" is anywhere near accurate, they are probably your worst enemy, and you should strongly consider bashing them right back before they set back the cause even more than you yourselves seem to be intent on setting it back.

Crap

Literally.

I really hate coming into something midway. Meetings. Conversations. TV shows.

After taking the trash out, I turned on "Mythbusters". They were talking about baking and then polishing animal dung. I'm not sure I want to know what this myth was about.

And then there was the other myth, about "hitting the ground running". You know folks? Sometimes a "myth" is just a colorful metaphor.

Too true

Giggle.

"They told Glenn Reynolds..." [updated]

[See update at end]

They told Glenn Reynolds that if George Bush were re-elected, people would be hounded out of their jobs for supporting unpopular political causes. And they were right!

CMT artistic director quits in fallout from Prop. 8 support

California Musical Theatre's artistic director, Scott Eckern, resigned from his post today amid controversy over a donation he made to the Proposition 8 campaign to ban gay marriage.

Eckern gave $1,000 in support of Proposition 8, a donation that sparked criticism from theater workers and the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender community.

[...]

Eckern said that he "honestly had no idea" that the contribution would spark such outrage and made the donation to act on his belief as the traditional definition of marriage be preserved.

"I support each individual to have rights and access, and I understand that in California domestic partnerships come with the same rights that come with marriage," he said.

Eckern said his sister is a lesbian in a committed relationship and he loves her and is supportive of her and her family, just as she is of him and his family.

"I definitely do not support any message or treatment of others that is hateful or instills fear," he said. "This is a highly emotional issue and the accusations that have been made against me are simply not true."

Get over yourselves, people.

UPDATE: Well, at least someone recognizes that you don't get people fired over political differences:

Supporters rally behind departed theater director

More than 100 people gathered outside the Music Circus today to support Scott Eckern, the theater director who resigned amid controversy over his donation to support the ban on same-sex marriage.

Carrying signs that read "You Made a Circus Out of Freedom" and "A Sad Day for Sacramento Theater," supporters from throughout the region showed up for the hastily arranged rally.

Good for them. I'm on the opposite side of the issue from Mr. Eckern, but people should not be punished for simply disagreeing with me on a political issue.

More than that, I'm getting really pissed off by people being too quick to throw around the word "bigot". It's not helpful to the cause (as a practical matter), it's not fair to the people whose only concern is a quaint notion of "marriage" (yet don't discriminate against gays and actively support gays having all the legal rights of marriage but are hesitant to grant the word), and it's grievously unfair to equate gay marriage with Jim Crow.

You want to equate the gay life before the Stonewall riots with Jim Crow? Fine, that's fair enough.

Want to compare the Brown case to the Lawrence case? A bit more of a stretch, but be my guest.

But please don't try to tell me that allowing all (or nearly all) of the legal rights of marriage, but not allowing the word for religious reasons, is morally equivalent to lynchings.

Tim Robbins: Jackass

Good grief.

NYC Election Board, Tim Robbins continue dispute

NEW YORK – Tim Robbins' difficulty in voting on Election Day was his own fault, New York City's Board of Elections maintains.

Board representative Gregory C. Soumas wrote a letter to Robbins, telling him that he was not on the rolls at the poll site he visited last week "because you simply went to the wrong poll site."

Soumas said Robbins filed a new voter registration form in February 2004, changing his voting address — which meant he had to vote elsewhere, about six blocks away.

The letter said Robbins should have gone to the new site and that this problem would have arisen earlier had Robbins voted in either the presidential primary in February or a second primary in September.

The confusion appears to stem from the double registration of Robbins — one his home address, the other his nearby office address — and the board eliminated one.

Okay, couple of things: One can register to vote in New York at an office? WTF? Every other place I've ever heard of, one is required to register at a permanent residence address.

Also, does New York not send out election materials that tell a voter where to vote? Shouldn't Robbins have noted that he was receiving two copies of voter pamphlets? With different voting addresses? Or does he just not read the voting material? Didn't it occur to him that he probably shouldn't have been double registered? Oy, what a dolt.

More:

"The system is in need of repair," said Robbins. "And the people that run it are pretty petty and vindictive when they would release to all the major newspapers in the New York area private information like your home address and your driver's license number."

Yeah, the system is in need of repair. And you can talk to Joe the Plumber on that "private information" part.

Robbins thinks the board's actions were meant "to save face," and reiterated that he hoped his case brought attention to broader voter troubles.

"If it hadn't been for shenanigans like this, Obama's margin would have been much, much higher," he said.

Uh huh. And if it hadn't been for the shenanigans pulled by ACORN and Friends, he might even have lost.

[Sigh]

Yeah, I've been expecting it, but still.

[sigh]

Veteran's Day

Thank you, veterans.

"You met another and..."

"...Pfft! We're still here"

Heh. Joel reminds me of an amusing song from "Hee Haw". I loved that song, even more than I love the "gloom despair" song. Here is an amusing compilation of "pfft" songs from the show:



You folks who think it's oh-so-cool to denigrate people who got a kick out of "Hee Haw" because only hicks would like it? Get over yourselves. Yeah, it was largely corn-pone giggles, but they actually had some trendy, sophisticated humor that "elitists" wouldn't get.

Christ on a pogo stick

Yet again. People, at least give the guy a chance to prove something before frickin' beatifying him. Oh, and just BTW: barring some unforeseen superhero antics, ain't no way in Hell he's going to rate a holiday by his lonesome when Washington and Lincoln have to share one.

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday, CTG!

Manifesto

Okay, I promised it. Here it is.

Yes, the Obamamessiah is President. My candidate lost. Hell, I'm in California, pretty much ALL of my candidates lose every election. I can accept that. I will not devolve into ODS, I will not call for impeachment before the guy is sworn in (nor after, absent actual impeachable offenses). I will not attempt to directly undermine his authority or office, only to oppose him when he is wrong. I will not attempt to have the election overturned, despite the documented instances of voter fraud.

HOWEVER:

None of the foregoing should be seen as declaring that there is nothing to do about election fraud. Oh no, there is plenty to do.

First of all, ACORN should be prosecuted to the fullest extent possible. I've seen calls for use of RICO against them, perhaps that's valid. Certainly all the documented cases should be prosecuted.

Second, we need a full investigation into the Minnesota Senate race. It looks really suspicious, as do some others. For cripe's sake, TWO different precincts BOTH just happened to mistakenly underreport Franken's total by 100 votes? And no one can produce the correct tape from election night? What I said before about not overturning the election? That only applies to the Presidential election. I'm happy to overturn some of the down-ballot races if they were the result of fraud. Throw the corrupt bums out and jail them if appropriate.

Third, we need to target some corrupt officials and get their asses thrown out of office and possibly jailed. Every frickin' politician in Chicago, for a start. But beyond that, the Minnesota Secretary of State, Mark Ritchie, looks pretty suspicious in some of the news stories. And this corrupt bitch? Get her ass out of office. The stories are just too common. She has flouted election laws and allowed fraud. Throw her out. And prosecute.

That's all I have time for now. There is so much more. Yes, I realize little will happen, the Dembulbs are in control of the Justice Department. But that doesn't mean that locals can't do it. And with a few successes, maybe things will change in the future to help ensure fraud-free elections.

Skeletons

Oh, good lord.

Somehow, the TV got changed over to what I think is "60 Minutes". Some blurb about Ted Turner and Jane Fonda.

Oh, good lord.

Okay, in fairness, Fonda looks pretty good after all the surgery and what not.

Ted Turner, not so much. I don't remember how old he is but he doesn't look good for anyone under 80.

And Morley Safer? (N.B., I think it's Morley Safer, haven't watched the show in 30 years or so. But Morley (assuming it's Morley), dude, please retire. You look like a skeleton.

Some quickies ...

... gleaned from Emily's place.

Monks brawling. This is so amusing on so many levels.

I get it, gay folks, you don't like Mormons. But in all un-PC fairness, you should take it up with blacks and Hispanics too. (N.B.: I see now that I check back on that post that, indeed, there has been some anti-black backlash, with some attendant un-P.C. language. See what the "post-racial" candidate hath wrought?)

Sarah Palin: Well, with all due respect, she is still a governor, though I'll remain agnostic on the playoff issue.

The night the Guinness almost got me killed [updated]

Or perhaps only kneecapped me. We'll never know for certain.

It was many many years ago (24, roughly) that I had my first taste of Guinness. The Sainted Bride was pregnant with Daughter Number One. Our college friends Ira (the Jew who made me an Honorary Jew) and Diane (who was Episcopalian or Baptist or something that didn't mix well with Jewish according to her family) came to visit us.

First amusing story: The Sainted Bride, about five months along in the pregnancy, had kicked off her shoes and reclined back on the couch to relax and feel better. And Ira said, "Gosh, I hope our friends from college don't see this." Well, at least she wasn't in the kitchen, barefoot and pregnant. [UPDATE: It was on this same visit that Ira, on seeing the SB's morning sickness, helpfully suggested we name the child "Ralph"]

Anyway, while they were visiting us, Sainted Bride and Lovely Friend Diane went to a (might have been more than one, the synapses are not certain) baby shower for The Sainted Bride. Meanwhile, Ira and I started hitting the bars. Had a beer at a biergarten on the Pacific Garden Mall (very good), hit another or three, and wound up at an Irish bar in Aptos called Murphy's. I decided to try a Guinness, as I'd never tried it before. The bartender suggested that I try a sample first, and drew me a small, ~2 oz. sample. I tasted it and liked it.

I said to the bartender, "I'd always heard that British stouts were very bitter." And a large fellow at the end of the bar, in a rather belligerent tone, said "Guinness...is...IRISH."

To which I replied...nothing. Just kinda shrunk down and drank a whole Guinness, embarrassed at the faux pas and not really interested in fighting anybody, least of all a large, possibly drunk Irishman.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Books

No real book review here, but I did recently finish (on CD) Atlas Shrugged. Very good.

I was a wee mite hesitant to listen to it, having tried unsuccessfully to slog my way through The Fountainhead, but it was a gem. I don't agree with the full philosophy behind Atlas Shrugged, but then I don't agree fully with anything. But it is an eye-opener and well worth your time, especially given the crypto-socialist mayhem we are likely in for in the next two years.

Kristalnacht

Seventy years on. My lovely friend Julie reminds us.

"Never forget". I'm a bit meaner than Julie, so I will add also "never forgive".

No particular reason for mentioning this, it just popped into my head

So a day late (and a dollar short, natch) I was responding to my little bro on some family history for a school project that my lovely niece is working on. I've mentioned before that my grandpa was in a wheelchair for about the last 10 years of his life. This was because he suffered for many years from a malady commonly called Burgher's Disease. The official ("Latin") name of this condition is:

Angiothrombosis Obliterans

I think the name says it all.

What the hell

Even if my candidate lost, there's no reason we can't have a little fun.

Introducing the JOE BIDEN VICE-PRESIDENTIAL GAFF-O-METER:



"Think you used enough digits there, Butch?"

Class

That's what separates the rational people from the fever swamps of the far left and right. This is how you accept defeat graciously, people.

Dave

Physics Geek

Wunderkraut

Bingley

CalTechGirl

Joel

I can't say it as well as they did, but Mr. President-Elect, you will be my President. I will support you when I should, I will oppose you when I have to, but I will not be a victim of ODS. Grow a brain, dummies.

Let me be the first to say it

THOMPSON/PALIN, 2012!

No time for a proper banner, though.

Fucking retards

All of them. On both sides of the issue, because I'm an equal opportunity offender.

To the fucking retards who brought the original suit, YOU FUCKING RETARDS. I called it. I told you so. Now deal with it, assholes.

California approves gay marriage ban

SAN FRANCISCO — California voters have approved a constitutional amendment outlawing same-sex marriage, overturning the state Supreme Court decision that gave gay couples the right to wed just months ago.
With almost all precincts reporting, Proposition 8 was leading by a 52%-48% margin. Its passage creates a legal limbo for thousands of same-sex couples from California and elsewhere who have been married in the past few months. Legal experts have said it will have to be resolved in court whether their unions still are valid.

Yeah, it will. I've seen a legal opinion that they would not be affected, I don't remember just where, based on contract law (the government cannot retroactively invalidate contracts, which is what a marriage is under the law), but I'm not sure that's certain. For one thing, under the law, marriage is a special contract which, unlike all other contracts, cannot be dissolved by the consent of the contract parties without the consent of the state. That will have to be sorted out in court.

But in the meantime, I will say "I told you so" to the retards who brought suit and convinced the retards on the California Supreme Court to go along with it.

And for you who voted against allowing gay marriage? With small exceptions for those who want to keep the religious idea of "marriage" but allow civil unions with all of the legal effects, and for that (probably small) minority who are only objecting to it being forced by a court rather than the legislature, and for those others who simply want to keep sexuality private and not public but who have old-fashioned (but not hateful) notions of "marriage", YOU ARE ALSO RETARDS.

Oh, but do you want some MORE retardity? Try this: YOU FUCKING RETARDS who think that trying to overturn a constitutional amendment by arguing that it "amounts to a revision of the state constitution, and therefore must be handled by the legislature", oh jesus christ, FUCK YOU. You are too stupid for words.

The cities, the ACLU, gay rights group Lambda Legal and the National Center for Lesbian Rights said today in lawsuits that the measure prevents courts from protecting the rights of minorities and amounts to a revision of the state constitution, and therefore must be handled by the legislature.

Oh, GAWD, crawl off someplace and die.

Law professor Vikram Amar said the lawsuit is a long shot.

At the risk of stating the blindingly, painfully obvious, DUH. Worse is the quote in the Sackatomatoes Bee (registration probably required):

The petition charges that Proposition 8 is invalid because the initiative process was improperly used in an attempt to undo the state constitution's core commitment to equality for everyone.

Which is roughly equivalent to arguing that the 21st Amendment to the U.S. Constitution is invalid because it is an attempt to undo the 18th Amendment.

Feh. You made your own beds, retards. Lie in it.

Quote of the day

I'm sure I'm mangling the exact quote, it was an hour or so ago that I heard it on the radio and I've been busy doing engineering stuff.

From Jonah Goldberg on the local RWDB radio morning show, about John Murtha:

You've got to love a guy who apologizes for calling his constituents "racist" by saying he meant to only call them "rednecks".

Home again, home again

Jiggety jig.

Or however that old rhyme goes. Can't remember.

Anyhoo, I'm home. Had a great week off and tomorrow it's back to the salt mines.

Yep, got my buck. Not as good a buck as he originally looked in the scope, but a respectable 3x3. Not as big as the Younger Nephew's buck (a very large 4-point) but I can live with it.

Also got two pigs, one a good sized (about 200 lb., best guess) sow who gave up four packages of spareribs in addition to the hams and shoulder roasts and neck roasts. The smaller boar (probably about 120 lbs.) gave up some smaller versions of same.

Sadly, Older Nephew didn't get a buck this year. HOWEVER, the young feller does have some bragging rights. See, he got a ~300 lb. sow. Head shot. Excellent head shot. Such a good head shot, in fact, that the bullet also performed a head shot on the roughly 400 lb. boar behind her also.

Two for one, as it were. The shot of a lifetime, and bragging rights for years. Not to mention enough pork for years. Way to go, my man!

And now, after a few hours on the road home, it is bedtime.

UPDATE: Rats. Almost forgot to mention that the Sainted Bride and Daughter Number Two were able to make it to the ranch for a short visit (up Saturday, home Sunday) to see The Latest Addition to the family, my cousin's granddaughter. What a sweetie she is. On my previous visit almost two months ago, I got a picture of me with The Latest Addition, which I forwarded to Daughter Number One. Received a reply along the lines of "you suck!" I will no doubt receive a similar reply when forwarding pics of The Latest Addition with EVERYONE IN THE FAMILY EXCEPT DAUGHTER NUMBER ONE.

But that's what she gets for flaking out by putting school and career ahead of deer season this year.

Oh, and The Latest Addition to the Family? Oh my God, she is SO FREAKIN' ADORABLE!